Titan's Fall Page 8

  “When you know you are going to die, you spend time seeking out finer moments,” Shriek explained.

  “Shriek, shut up,” I said. “Before you undo all the goodwill.”

  Amira looked around the whole bar. “We don’t have much to trade.”

  Shriek swept a wing hand toward the bar at the very center, a circular table filled with humans shifting to and from it. “I have opened a tab for the platoon under my auspices.”

  Zhao grabbed Shriek’s half-metal, half-struthiform head in two hands and kissed the top of the wrinkled, ruined skin. “I’ve always liked this feathered freak. Haven’t I always said I love him?”

  “You have never said such a thing,” the alien medic protested.

  “Oh, well, remember that Min Zhao says she loves you. Min Zhao! Come on, Shriek, say my name!”

  Shriek shoved her away with an angry hiss.

  Aran Patel and Suqi Kimmirut stared at us as we laughed. “Serves the fucking walking chicken right for ditching us,” Greg Vorhis muttered from behind Zhao.

  “Shriek doesn’t want to learn our names,” I explained to Suqi. “It upsets him.”

  “I think,” Amira said, gently shoving at us, “we should get to the bar before Shriek changes his fickle little mind about that bar tab.”

  I managed a seat next to Suqi and listened to the back-and-forth chatter. Aran and Suqi didn’t join in, but they took to the simple glasses of clear alcohol quickly enough.

  It numbed. It burned. Did what it needed to do. And maybe, if we kept going, we could leave Titan somewhere behind us.

  Live for the moment, Shriek had told me. Because that moment is all you’ll get.

  Five glasses later, I was light-headed enough to realize I’d been carrying something on my back. An invisible weight that melted away, glass by glass.

  Suqi was asking something.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Are you okay?”

  I’d been staring at her, I realized. “I’m sorry,” I said. I reached out and touched her knee. Shriek was right. You only ever had that minor moment. The now. The now was all we had. Because there was nothing but an uncertain haze in the future.

  Suqi’s drawn-in breath jolted me. She yanked backward and stood up from the stool. “Sir . . .” She sounded embarrassed and wounded.

  Yeah. Half her squad had died in front of her and someone who outranked her had just grabbed her knee.

  “Shit, Kimmirut,” I mumbled. “I’m sorry.”

  She shook her head and put the glass down. “I’m going back,” she said.

  I stood up to follow her and wobbled. “Ah, fuck.”

  I’d never been a hard partier. My parents had been more concerned with dragging me from tent camps and basements to protests. They organized walkouts and strikes, and there was no time for me to be stupid. Not when you were the Harts’ son.

  Here I was, playing soldier. Pretending to be a hard-­drinking veteran when I was just lucky to have escaped.

  But it had been a nice few minutes. The alcohol burning out chains that held me to each of these individuals. Leader. I wasn’t a leader, I realized as I stumbled toward Ken. I wasn’t raised to be one. Or taught. I’d just lived through a Conglo­merate attack on the moon, and the Accordance used me as propaganda.

  All I’d done was survive.

  I tried to grab Ken’s shoulder. To tell him. But Amira intercepted me and slipped under my shoulder to steady me. “You don’t look so good; let’s get you back to the bar to lean on.”

  “You were right,” I told her. “I fucked up.”

  “Come over here and tell me about it.”

  I twisted back around. Ken was in deep conversation with a monstrously tall man who had muscles on his muscles. The kind you handed the big guns to. “Ken has made a friend.”

  “It’s been hard for him since Boris,” Amira said, pushing me back to the bar. “I think he needs to connect. Maybe let off some steam. After all we went through, we all need to let off some steam.”

  I looked at Amira and then back to Ken. “He’s gay?”

  “You didn’t know?”

  I shook my head.

  “Devlin. Fuck. You don’t pay close attention to the people you lead, do you?” Amira handed me another glass of the clear stuff.

  “I didn’t ask for it,” I said. “Any of it.”

  “Yet here we are.”

  I squinted at her. “If we all need to let off steam, have you?”

  “Day we docked.” Amira sipped at the glass. She didn’t say it with satisfaction or relish. There was a sudden grimness to her.

  “Do you feel better?” I asked.

  “I don’t feel worse,” she said.

  A group of miners off shift had been watching them. One of them got up from his table. “You assholes are here partying,” he said loudly, “while friends of mine working back on Titan are dead, you fucking collaborators.”

  The air in the bar buzzed and snapped with voices that sounded like a set of electrical wires dropped on each other.

  Amira let go of her glass and stepped forward. “What did you say?”

  The fact that she hadn’t sworn left me feeling suddenly sober.

  The man had a certain ropiness to him. The muscles that came from spending long hours operating heavy tools deep inside the asteroid. He was covered in a gray dust, and his green eyes seemed ghostly behind all that dust.

  “You pieces of shit need to crawl back into that cave you’re hiding in,” the miner said. “Stay back in there and cower.”

  I walked over. “Hey, man, we just want to drink in peace.”

  “Drinks we got into this bar. Any of you know how hard that is? Know what’s going on back on Earth while you march around for the Accordance? Food riots. Executions. They’re standing on our backs for a war we didn’t ask for. And here you all are, enjoying a drink on the tab of one of those damn ugly walking chickens. Bunch of fucking useless collaborators.”

  “Hey,” I started to say. They were collaborators too, out here working for the Accordance.

  Amira hit him in the chin with the heel of her hand. He stood a foot taller than her, but he went back and flopped onto the table, smacking into it and scattering glasses. She was, apparently, not interested in talking any further.

  The miner’s four friends launched themselves at us. I still had my hands up when I got hit in the face. I should have gone down. I was not a brawler; I’d barely struggled through training, with Ken constantly singling me out.

  But something snapped in me. Trying to calm the situation was no longer an option.

  And I wanted to fight. I wanted to break something.

  “Dev!” Ken shouted, leaping in.

  “Here.”

  We fell in close to each other, backs in, facing out. Amira had picked up a barstool to use as a club, and two miners were out cold on the ground.

  But the rest of the bar had turned against us.

  There was a brief moment where we kept formation, but then the melee set in. We were all just brawling. Punching, kicking, rolling and fighting. Just us against the world, skin on skin. In the moment.

  Until carapoids broke through the walls. Before the splintered pieces of wood were done falling to the ground, we were getting thrown to the ground and zip-tied with our hands behinds our backs.

  I threw up onto the ground in front of me and groaned with pain as a thick pair of carapoid boots kept me shoved against the rocky floor so hard, I waited for a rib to break.

  12

  The door to the industrial-sized airlock we’d been shoved into rolled open. Amira and I stood up, somewhat unsteadily, shielding our eyes from the bright light. We’d been lying on hard rock for hours in the dark.

  Once my eyes adjusted, I could make out that the silhouettes were five carapoids carrying
stun guns and eyeing us with their diamond-like eyes. And between them all, a familiar figure. The man who’d dragged me out of a cell and into the Colonial Protection Forces.

  “Anais,” I growled.

  “Colonel Vincent Anais,” he corrected. “The first few times we met, I was working in a consulting capacity. Since the increased human independence within the CPF, I now have rank.”

  “Colonel,” I muttered.

  “Lieutenant.” He smiled. His face was more pinched since the last time I saw him. More lines around his eyes. He carried a somberness around him, now, like an invisible lead cape. “I’d like to say it’s good to meet you again, but with you, it is always complicated. You owe me a favor.”

  Colonel Anais snapped his fingers, and one of the carapoids set a chair down on the ground. Anais straddled it and looked at us all mildly.

  “A favor?” I said.

  He nodded and his eyes narrowed. “A big favor. Because you’re still a lieutenant. Look, I know there’s a lot on your shoulders. A platoon, your parents under house arrest because the Accordance needs to keep an eye on them. But you need to remember that it isn’t just the Conglomeration that has it out for you, Devlin. You have enemies elsewhere. Captain Zeus’s children are very upset that you maimed their mother, and they want your head. They’ve been waiting for any mistake. You handed it to them. Zeus’s line wants you all to live in a cell for the rest of your lives.”

  “Wait, their mother?” I asked.

  Ken staggered up to join me and Amira. The full-on hangover and soreness from bruises were leaving us barely able to stand in front of Anais. “Zeus is a traitor!” Ken hissed. “We fought a traitor for our lives. Again on Titan.”

  Anais nodded. “Well, traitor Zeus may be, but Zeus was still Arvani. And Arvani expect to be treated . . . like Arvani. Do you understand?”

  Ken rocked in place. “But Zeus killed almost everyone in Icarus Base.”

  “Mother?” I repeated.

  Anais looked from Ken back to me. “Yes. Zeus is male currently. Zeus was female earlier in life. They can change their sex, it is not that shocking, there are creatures that do this on Earth as well.”

  Ken interrupted. “Who cares about Zeus’s sex. Zeus tried to kill us. We are going to be punished for doing our duties?”

  “Yes,” Anais said. “Zeus’s progeny have high status in Arvani command circles. But . . . the CPF is independent. The pressure rolled downhill, and I convinced Command to put you all on shit detail for the rest of the war. You’ll be scrubbing toilets, digging rock, and volunteering for dangerous manual labor whenever it comes up.”

  “They could be traitors, too, like Zeus,” Ken said. “They probably are.”

  Anais shook his head. “I wouldn’t say anything like that out loud ever again if you enjoy being alive, Awojobi. Besides, the progeny haven’t left Accordance yet. They are full Arvani still, with all the naturally superior rights that being Arvani entails.”

  Amira’s laughter stopped Anais cold. He looked at her, visibly annoyed. She smiled back at him. “Some Accordance will always be more equal than others,” she said.

  “You’re quoting from illegal native literature,” Anais said. “Again, not a smart thing to do out loud on your part. George Orwell’s books have been burned or ferreted out by virus.”

  Amira stopped laughing and frowned. She opened her mouth, but Anais held up a hand.

  “I’ve stopped you from being executed or even some of the other plans suggested. You’re going to be on a security detail for a while until you can be moved to one of the asteroids that are being drilled out.”

  “This is bullshit!” Ken snapped, angry and surprising me. Amira put a hand on his shoulder.

  “You’re right,” Anais said. “But before you get shipped off to chip rocks, or worse, there’s time. And you never know what will happen between now and then. So, keep your damn heads down. The CPF is underpowered. We need you all alive and functioning. Humanity cannot afford to lose fighters. So, don’t give up yet.”

  Someone behind me burped and groaned.

  “Earth is falling apart,” Anais said, more softly. “Earth First operatives are gaining more followers. And since the Arvani are diverting military resources to fight, security on Earth is faltering. We are retreating to more secure compounds, like Antarctica or the moon.”

  We were CPF soldiers, embedded in the Accordance. Going where they needed. We’d gotten whispers and rumors, but this was the first time hearing what had been going on in the year since we’d left. “My parents?” I asked, leaning forward. This all started when the CPF all but kidnapped me and forced me to join.

  Anais grimaced. “We don’t know where your parents are.”

  I should have known. I grabbed the desk. “Their safety was the reason I agreed to this hell,” I hissed. “I gave you your propaganda victory, the son of the famous dissidents joining the CPF and doing his duty. I played the part. And then some. What the fuck am I doing here if not saving them from Accordance ‘justice’?”

  My anger didn’t even penetrate Anais’s almost-bored facade. “You’re here because you know that it keeps the Accordance from just bombing any camp they think your parents are hiding in. Because you’ve seen that there are worse things than Accordance oversight.”

  “Oversight?” Amira laughed. “Occupation.”

  “The Conglomeration will literally mine people for what they’re worth, and then refashion them into something useful for the goals of their gestalt. You might live, but your children will end up being a biological appendage to their civilization. We’ve seen them do it to countless worlds. And—”

  “What about my family?” Ken interrupted. “What about my brothers and sisters?”

  “Your family’s role in the Accordance was recognized. They’ve been relocated to refugee quarters at Tranquility. They’re safe.”

  “Refugees?”

  “Be grateful,” Anais said. “Sections of Earth are trying to devolve into self-rule. It hasn’t happened yet, but the chaos is tricky. In the meantime, I need you all to stay alive, out of trouble, and out of sight of Zeus’s family. I know I’m going to need seasoned fighters. I’m telling you about your families in trust. Trust that you’ll understand the larger picture. Trust that you are smart enough to know what needs to be done, and that sacrifices have to be made.”

  Anais stood back up from his chair.

  “So, now what?” I asked.

  Anais looked at the rest of the platoon clustered up behind me. “Lunch is being served. Go eat, get over your hangovers. Get cleaned up. When you get back, you’ll be told where security detail is. Try not to screw up. If you’re not doing what you’re assigned, you stay right the hell here. You only leave this little cave when you’re getting something to eat. Got it?”

  “Yes,” I said wearily.

  Anais stared at me for a while, and I looked blankly at him. Then he nodded, turned around, and left.

  + + +

  “You must be laughing at me now,” Ken said to me on the way back to our quarters from lunch an hour later. “To see that you were right about the cost of working with them.”

  “No,” I shook my head. “I’m not laughing.”

  “It wasn’t the wealth we had or my own opportunities. It was the infrastructure. The cities they helped us build. The technologies we gained. The great equalization, after so many decades of underinvestment. Knowing that, with the tools, our countries could be as great as any that had looked down at us in the past. We were never stupid; it was divide and conquer. The Europeans did it between people in the past, Accordance did the same by approaching the developing world and offering them more to sign the treaties that formalized oversight.”

  I grabbed Ken’s shoulder. “I guess Earth First, and my parents, are not going to be welcoming either of us if we ever get back home.”


  Amira broke the moment as she shoved us from behind. “You weepy little shits.”

  “Damn, Amira, we wouldn’t even be here if you hadn’t thrown that punch,” I shouted back at her, genuinely angry.

  “I’m going to have notes in my file,” Ken said.

  “Really?” Amira made a face. “You knew the fight was going to happen. I just decided to get it over with and skip the posturing bullshit. None of those miners were going to talk it out and you damn well know it.”

  “True,” Ken said. Then he smiled. “Shame you spent so much time on your ass, Devlin; we could have used the help.”

  “The fuck?” I was outraged. “I was first to your sides. Both of you ungrateful assholes. I should have walked right out of there and left you for the carapoids.”

  Amira laughed. “I’m sure your parent’s nonviolent methods would have worked in a bar fight.”

  “We don’t know if we don’t try,” I told her, and my outrage couldn’t be maintained; I laughed. “We’re all fucked. I’m laughing because I don’t know what else I can do.”

  “I know.” We walked side by side, lapsing into silence. Then I grabbed them both in a hug on each side.

  Whatever happened, we were going through it all together. Even if it was shit.

  Amira said in a lower voice, “When we get back, you need to divvy up the squads and make some choices. You can’t keep running away from that. We lost people.”

  I hadn’t wanted to do this. But glancing back at Kimmirut and Patel, I knew she was right. They were trailing behind us all. “Kimmirut with Delta. Patel to Alpha. And four becomes three, just like that.”

  “Who takes over Alpha?” Ken asked.

  “Smiley,” I said. Lana Smalley as Sergeant. A few months before, Smiley had been standing in a giant crater carved out of the side of a flying mining platform, frozen and staring up at the clouds above. Now she turned and ran toward problems without Ken or me saying a thing.

  “I’ll tell them,” Ken said.

  “Thank you,” I whispered, unsure of my own voice suddenly.